I had the privilege of sharing an interview with Patricia Wade-Goings of WYTV7 Christian Broadcast Network a couple of week’s ago. Her program shares stories from real people who have journeyed through something and can share some inspiration and hope. She asked me to share my story.
Patricia and I struggled to arrange an interview time. We rescheduled several times, due to production situations, etc. The interview finally happened. It was not until that morning that I realized it was happening on a significant day, that you will realize when you watch. It took a few weeks to air, and that ended up airing this week, Mother’s Day week. Another coincidence… or maybe not.
The last time I held Louis without any wires, IV’s, etc, was Mother’s Day. I carried him into the hospital for the last time. We never came home from that last hospital trip. He died 4 days later. Mother’s Day is terribly difficult for me. I can still feel his tiny hands wrapped around my neck and his head on my chest as I ran into the ER that night, his head wounds leaking cerebral spinal fluid. Pat was finding a parking space. The triage nurse took one look at him, with a waiting room full of patients and just waved us right through without any questions at all. She could see what was happening. We never even sat down or gave her our name. Sometimes it’s not good to get ushered right into the ER. Yes. That is my Mother’s Day memory.
So, my family and I do things differently. It has never worked for us to be so joyful and happy on this day. It is a difficult day for us. For me. For my husband who parked the car and entered the ER and couldn’t find us. For Meagan, almost 4 years old, whose Mommy left her on Mother’s day and didn’t come home for 4 days, and when she did come home, she didn’t have her brother with her. It’s a tough day for us. We celebrate it in the middle of summer, when no one else is thinking about it, when we are away and alone. Just the 5 of us. No expectations. No Hallmark reminders. No signs, commercials, social media posts. Just being together because we want to be. That works for us.
So, in this interview I share my heart. I share my journey. I share a piece of me that I’ve not shared before. I share where Breathe Grace Yoga came from. I decided to share this today, on Mother’s Day weekend, because maybe it will help someone else who struggles on this day. Maybe if this day is not all roses for you, know you are not alone. I am with you. I am praying for you today.
And for all of you, may you feel peace today in your hearts. Thank you for reading and for watching. God Bless.